20061113

Diocesan Convention, Clergy Abuse and finding Home

The Convention of the Diocese of Pennsylvania held on St. Martin's Day, November 11, generated tremendous feelings among the people gathered there. One friend found his palms perspiring so visceral was his reaction. There was fear, grief and anger. Fear can push us into powerlessness or it can lead us to a greater vulnerability and awareness of what it is to be human. It is out of our humanity and our awareness of one another as children of God that we can create safe and sacred communities. And it is this that we need to do. There was grief, from the Bishop's contrition over protecting his brother from exposure as a sex offender, to personal stories of others who had suffered abuse in their past. Though it is hard to use the word "past" as the experiences were still raw and painful. Grief is our response to the shattering of trusts and it is a realization that some significant change has taken place in life. Like fear, grief can be the soil out of which can come spiritual breakthrough. We need to work to make the church community a place of healing and new beginning. This is especially hard when the church has been a place of offense. There was a great deal of anger. Anger is our response to injury. We can express anger destructively or creatively. Anger can help us live justice-seeking and compassionate lives.

The response of the Convention took the shape of the following resolution: "Be it resolved that the Diocese of Pennsylvania initiate immediately a program of expanded education around the effects of clergy sexual abuse and other abuses and the damage caused by long-term secrecy and cover-up."

The damage caused can be glimpsed through this poem written by an anonymous survivor of clergy abuse in a book entitled, Defrauded. The title of the poem is "This is home."

In the small dark closet
I'm not there
I don't exist
No one can see me

Here in the dark
I can't see
I can't feel
No one can hate me

It feels right
To not be heard
To be all gone
No one to hurt

No one can hurt me
Or desert me
I'm alone
This is home

What a disfigurement of home is brought about by sexual abuse. The home that Jesus promises is the indwelling of God, Creator and Savior. "Those who love me will keep my word (of love), and my Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them" (John 14: 23). Earlier Jesus assured that we have a dwelling place in our Creator's house (home). There we exist truly and are seen for the child of God that we are. In this home of mutual indwelling we can feel and are listened to. We are all present and not alone. Come Lord Jesus. May we make our home in you as you have already made your home in us.