To the Mother of a Gay Son

"I am searching for a church and am wondering what your church's view is on homosexuality? I have a son whom is gay and this is important to me."

Dear M.:

The Vestry (the governing board of Saint Paul's) made it clear many years ago that all are welcome. "The vestry enthusiastically affirms that Saint Paul's Episcopal Church, Chestnut Hill, is an inclusive and welcoming faith community, open to all. Saint Paul's cherishes all its parishioners, both recent arrivals and lifelong members."

You would probably like a little more than this blanket statement that all are welcome. Our congregation includes gay and lesbian Christians in leadership positions as well as in the pews. Why this is so is based on our tradition as well as scripture. Let me explain.

Tradition
We say in the Episcopal Church that "praying shapes believing." As far back as 1967 an advisory committee of the national church instructed that "one of the characteristics of (Episcopal) tradition is that it holds unity - at least its own interior unity - to depend not so much on people thinking alike about the 'how' of God's action as it does on people doing Christian things, including the liturgical acts (worship), together." (1) We judge people orthodox by whether they wish to join in the celebration of God's being and goodness in the prayers and worship of our Book of Common Prayer. That is, all who listen to God's word spoken and preached, who recite the ancient creeds, who confess their short-falls with respect to God's glory, who join in the Great Thanksgiving of communion, come forward to receive Christ, and go out to work for the mending of creation, they are part of our community. Our prayer together shapes what we believe about ourselves as church, that we are "an inclusive and welcoming faith community, open to all."

Scripture
A scriptural view of homosexuality, to my mind, rests on our understanding of the Holy Spirit. The same Holy Spirit that was poured out upon the disciples (Acts 2) at Pentecost (50th day after Easter) is given to each person who is baptized. It does not matter whether you are homosexual or not. The Hebrew word for Spirit, Ruach, means wind or breath as well as Spirit. The Spirit is God's presence and creative power. Like the wind, "Spirit" always means something living and moving and not what is rigid. The Hebrew word ruach is likely related to another Hebrew word rewah that means breadth. (2) Spirit creates space. It leads out of narrow straits into wide vistas. As I prayed about the church and homosexuality, the scriptures that were given to me (by the same Spirit) were from the Psalms. Psalm 18: 20 - "God brought me out into an open place; he rescued me because he delighted in me," There is that Spirit that creates space - for me, for you, for your son, for gays and lesbians. And then again in Psalm 31: 8 - "You have not shut me up in the power of the enemy; you have set my feet in an open place." The psalm's "enemy" is that which constricts and binds. The Spirit instead leads us into wide spaces where we can unfold and be who we most truly are. Now does this mean anything goes? Of course not. It is Jesus' Spirit so that it is the Spirit of compassion.

For any who might question this reliance on the Holy Spirit for a scriptural understanding of homosexuality, I would only point to Paul and the way he dealt with issues of sexuality in his own time. When Paul is lacking a specific word of the Lord (that is, from Jesus) he invokes the Holy Spirit. In his day the issue was about sex and marriage. With regard to marriage Paul does have a word of the Lord - 1Corinthians 7: 10, "To the married I give this command - not I but the Lord - that the wife should not separate from her husband... and that the husband should not divorce his wife." Jesus did say something about this - "Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate" (Mark 10: 9). Now, in the Spirit of Jesus most churches have recognized that sometimes marriage for very good reasons comes to an end, but we ought not to take it lightly. When Paul does not have a clear word of the Lord he declares, "I say - I and not the Lord, but I give my opinion..." (1Corinthians 7: 25). Then he ends the chapter by saying, "And I think that I too have the Spirit of God." (3) There's that Holy Spirit again.

Jesus said nothing about homosexuality. We have no word of the Lord. When we do not have such certainty or new situations present themselves, we need, like Paul, to invoke the Spirit. Again, in a Passover Psalm (118: 5), "From the straits I called to God. God answered me in a wide-open place." The church's view is wide-open when it comes to including homosexuals in Christian community. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

M., this is probably more than you needed to know. But the question is an important one and I thought I should give you a full response.

Notes:

(1) Bayne, Jr., Stephen F., "Theological Freedom and Social Responsibility: Report of the Advisory Committee of the Episcopal Church;" New York: The Seabury Press, 1967; p. 20. The Report is also referenced in Booty, John, An American Apostle: The Life of Stephen Fielding Bayne, Jr., Valley Forge: Trinity Press International, 1997, p. 147.

(2) The discussion of ruach and rewah is found in Moltmann, Jurgen, The Spirit of Life: A Universal Affirmation, Minneapolis: Fortress Press, 1994, p. 43.

(3) The discussion of Paul's use of the Spirit in 1Corinthians is from Stendahl, Krister, Energy for Life: Reflections on the Theme "Come, Holy Spirit - Renew the Whole Creation;" Geneva: WCC Publications, 1990, p. 43-44.